BGG's Worst Ranked Strategy Games
It's not pretty down there...
Hey everyone, and welcome back!
Over the past week or so, I kicked around the idea of ranking the worst rated games on BGG. The problem is that when you look at the overall rankings, the bottom of the list is packed with children’s games. Sorry, but Chutes and Ladders isn’t catching any strays from me.
Instead, I decided to focus on the lowest ranked games in BGG’s Strategy category. There are 3,254 games on the list, and I had to scroll through 58 of them before I found a title I actually recognized. That’s how deep into the gaming abyss we’re about to venture.
The question is simple: which one would you add to your collection if you had to? The stakes are high. You either pick one to keep on your shelf, or you’re banned from the hobby forever. Vote in the poll at the bottom after reading or skimming!
So, here are the bottom five strategy games on BGG.
Dead Last: #3,254 of 3,254
Trump: The Game (1989)
BGG Rating: 4.1 (778 ratings)
LOL. How fitting. The board looks like one of those paper placemats that you find at most diners. Here’s the description from BGG:
Players compete in two parts. In the first part, players circle the board, feeding money into the eight available properties, then bidding on those properties (not being able to see how much the property is worth) and collecting "Trump" cards. When all the properties are gone, the negotiation phase begins. Players use their Trump cards to buy and sell properties, some cards award huge payoffs for specific sets. After each player has passed their turn, the property values are revealed, and the player with the most money wins (usually in the $400-$600M range).
This game also appears on BGG’s Family Games ranking, where it sits at 3,605 out of 3,617. In other words, there are only a dozen or so family games ranked lower. That’s Monopoly territory.
Hopefully, the negotiation in Trump: The Game is more successful than the negotiations associated with its namesake. I’ll leave that thought there before this accidentally turns into a political discussion.
Trump: The Game is ranked 30,708th on BGG overall out of a possible 30,792 games.
#3,253 – Outdoor Survival (1972)
Rating: 4.9 (1,062 ratings)
Considering I'm not much of a campaign gamer, this one doesn't look like it'd be a great fit for me. The artwork absolutely screams 1972. If someone showed me this box and asked where it was from, I'd probably guess it was a drafted aerial view of some Pokémon region—Kanto, Johto, or whatever the latest one is.
In Outdoor Survival, you are are lost in the wilderness and have to escape.
“There are 5 different scenarios from inexperienced hikers lost in the woods to a rescue party trying to find a lost person. You will have to deal with animals, finding food and water, mother nature and sickness without dying to win.
Oh, and if you were curious what punchboards looked like in the 1970’s, here ya go! Wonder if BGG is considering GeekUp Bits for these.
Outdoor Survival is ranked 30,703rd on BGG overall out of a possible 30,792 games.
#3,252 – Assassin (1993)
Rating: 3.9 (270 ratings)
This 3-6 player game puts players in Europe, where they’ll be traveling around a map and scoring points for each destination they can get to.
Card play determines destination, transportation method, and distance traveled. Players may play hazard cards to block or slow down their opponents. One of the players is the assassin and scores bonus points by getting a "hit" on one of the other players. Game length is variable: when a weapon card is drawn by a player, it is placed on the map. When the fourth weapon card is drawn, the game ends.
Assassin is a revised edition of a 1992 release called Eurohit, which has a rating of 3.6 on BGG. The specified number of points to surpass in the OG version in order to win the game is 500, which would even take a while in a game of Flip 7.
The box cover looks like the artwork for a low budget crime thriller you'd find gathering dust in a VHS rental store. Either that, or the cover of an issue of Assassin Magazine from the 1970s (a publication that may or may not exist; I didn't bother to check).
Assassin is ranked 30,697th on BGG overall out of a possible 30,792 games.
#3,251 – Burn in Hell (2004)
Rating: 4.4 (408 ratings)
You could say this game is already burning in the fiery depths of BGG Strategy H E double hockey sticks. Surprisingly, it’s not even the newest game in this bottom five. You’ll have to keep reading for that distinction.
Ranked 959th in BGG’s Party Games category, Burn in Hell has players collecting cards representing infamous historical figures and villains, trading them with friends, and, of course, stealing them from one another. Because if your game features characters like John Wilkes Booth, it would be almost irresponsible not to include at least one morally questionable game mechanic.
BGG describes the game as assembling “the tastiest ‘Circles’ of history’s sinners.” Players collect a wide range of notorious figures, from Ivan the Terrible and Elvis (?) to Al Capone and Saddam Hussein. At its core, it’s a set collection game, with players gathering different “sinners” into their circles.
The game even invites the idea of debating who belongs in which category of wrongdoing—though that’s not actually part of the rules. Honestly, it probably should be.
Burn in Hell is ranked 30,667th (+30 from Assassin!) on BGG overall out of a possible 30,792 games.
#3,250 – Fallen City of Karez (2012)
Rating: 4.5 (307 ratings)
Out of all the games in this bottom five, this one actually has the highest complexity rating at 3.06 out of 5. The rest sit at 1.77 or below, which makes this feel almost like a different genre entirely.
And if busy board art tends to give you a headache, this is probably the point where you should quietly close this tab. Otherwise… here we go.
There is a lot going on here. The board has a visual style that feels like an old city you might build on one of those war and civilation apps, but with the color and chaos of the game Raiders of Scythia. Hopefully I’m not offending any residents of Karez here. I'm sure it would be beautiful, hypothetically, if it actually existed (no need to check…I already did).
Anyway, here’s the BGG description…
In Fallen City of Karez, each player will take the role of a lord of one of the guilds who seek to tighten their grasp on the rising city. The players will strive to maintain a balance between keeping the city safe for its citizens by sending exploration parties to defeat any threats, and at the same time attracting to the emerging city new adventurers wishing to fill their pockets with fortunes and their names with glory.
There’s city building, dice rolling, and worker placement here, but that complexity rating still feels too low compared to just how busy the board is. Sorry, I just can’t let it go. If this were a design from 1982, sure…but 2012? Sigh.
And then there’s another wrinkle: it’s semi-cooperative. You’re all representing different guilds working toward individual goals, but everyone loses if the city isn’t saved by the end of the game.
Fallen City of Karez is ranked 30,611th on BGG overall out of a possible 30,792 games, only three spots away from 2016’s Mega Man: The Board Game.
Don’t forget to vote!
Well, that was fun… or maybe a complete waste of time. I’ll let the analytics decide.
Either way, thanks for sticking with me through the bottom of the barrel of BGG Strategy rankings. See you next time…and keep Chutes and Ladders out of your mouth!
Very cool article idea! :P
I'd give the scenario-based/campaigny game a try if I had to pick one.